


Out of Tune

by Royal_Prussian_Fox



Category: Persona 4, Persona Q: Shadow of the Labyrinth
Genre: Gen, Humor, but those are the main ones - Freeform, other characters too - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-30 17:52:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12114039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Royal_Prussian_Fox/pseuds/Royal_Prussian_Fox
Summary: Adapting to this haven in the rift, where there are more Persona-users than Yosuke can shake a stick at, is a bit of a learning curve. Yosuke's always been bad at learning curves.





	Out of Tune

**Author's Note:**

> This work is actually the reason I created an account here. This piece was already halfway done at that point... and then I just never finished it. Fast-forward more than a year and I dug it out of my computer and realized that I'd still like to work on it. So that's why you're getting a Persona Q fic three years after the game came out.
> 
> Most of my experience with Persona is through Persona Q, so please forgive me if I've messed up some details here and there. Oh, in this piece the player characters are "Yu Narukami" and "Minato Arisato." Apologies to those used to seeing the other names!
> 
> Comments always appreciated.

Looking back, it really shouldn't have been surprising that there were other Persona-users out there. What were the odds that a bunch of ragtag high schoolers in a podunk town smack-dab in the middle of Nowheresville would be the only ones to know about Personas? If supernatural stuff could happen in rural Inaba (although after being sucked into another world where manifestations of people's suppressed thoughts violently slaughtered them, Yosuke wasn't quite sure exactly what _was_ supernatural anymore), then surely strange things could happen in other cities around the world. Tokyo. Osaka. Even Nairobi, a foreign-sounding city Yosuke had heard of once and thought was maybe somewhere in India.

And Iwatodai, apparently. When Yosuke and the other members of the Investigation Team first arrived in this strange, otherworldly Yasogami High, they had spent all of three minutes getting their bearings before Margaret abruptly announced that "there are others here with whom your fates are tied," forced them to practice those ridiculous poses, and practically shoved them headfirst into the You in Wonderland exhibit without so much as a please, thank you, or even a "By the way, there are Shadows in there, so have fun!" Everything else — meeting a brand-new set of Persona-users from out of nowhere, fighting the never-ending waves of card soldiers, and finally, _finally_ defeating the Queen of Hearts — passed in a blur of activity. Before Yosuke could properly process anything, the number of Persona-users he knew had instantly doubled.

It wasn't as if all the tension was now gone from fighting Shadows, but there was at least a little peace of mind in knowing that there were others like them out there, and now they were fighting the same fight together. Just in case the worst happened, backup would be right there. Tough Shadows could be steamrolled in no time flat. Their group had doubled, and so had their power. Maybe even more than doubled? It could be like one of those math formulas that kept getting bigger the more you added, the ones that cursed Yosuke to eternally awful grades in math class.

"Arf arf!"

"Koromaru-san says that he does not smell any Shadows in the immediate vicinity. I can additionally report that my sensors have not detected any Shadow readings within a 100-meter radius."

Yu had led a small group back into You in Wonderland to get a handle on everyone's combat abilities. "If I'm going to lead our combined forces, I should understand everyone's skills," Yosuke remembered him saying. He was hyper-prepared as always. The red-haired girl with piercing eyes agreed (Mitsuru, it took Yosuke's brain a few beats to supply), which is why Yu, Yosuke, and Kanji were taking stock of their inventory and progress while Koromaru and Aigis had just returned from scouting the nearby area for Shadows.

Yu got up from where he had been sitting with Yosuke and Kanji. "Welcome back, and thanks for the report, Aigis. You too, Koromaru," Yu added, kneeling down to rub the shiba inu's head. Koromaru let out a pleased whine, his tail wagging back and forth like a metronome trying to keep up with an impossibly fast beat.

"He's so goddamn adorable…" Kanji shuffled his feet and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

"Aw, has Kanji been struck by cupid's arrow at long last? Didn't know he was your type!" Yosuke teased.

"I'll tell you where I'm gonna shove that arrow," Kanji growled.

"We should get moving," Yu, always the voice of calm, interrupted them. "How are you holding up in the Velvet Room, Fuuka?"

"Uh, um! We're fine here!" Fuuka said over the communication link. "I can verify Aigis and Koromaru's report. There don't appear to be any Shadows until you get to the next floor."

"Aw, Senpai, you didn't forget about me, did you? That's how you break a girl's heart, you know!" Rise joined in, pouting.

Yu smiled. "Rise, I thought I said you could take a break on the navigating for now."

"I can't stand still and do nothing while everyone else is adventuring! Besides, I can't just eat festival food all the time. Even if I'm on hiatus, an idol still has to watch her figure!" Even in another dimension, Yosuke could almost see her giggling and throwing her arm around Yu.

"That's all well and good," Yu explained, "but I need to get used to the way Fuuka conducts herself in the labyrinths. You can stick around, but if you wouldn't mind, would you let Fuuka take charge of communications from the Velvet Room for now?"

"Well, since you asked so nicely, Senpai."

"Th-thank you, Rise-san," Fuuka piped up.

"Aw, there's no need to be so formal! I said you can just call me Rise — everyone else does!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, Rise-sa — uh, Rise. I'll remember!"

"Jeez, and you don't have to apologize either!"

"Ah! I'm sorry."

"See? That's exactly what I'm talking about!"

Yosuke felt his head pound. He definitely wasn't used to having two voices in his head at once and prayed to whatever god ruled over this place that it would happen less often than part-timers bailing on Junes shifts. Which was depressingly common.

Yu carried on. "I'll be in the back as we move forward; it'll be easier for me to observe from there. Aigis, you should stick behind, too. I want to see how far your range is. Kanji, Koromaru, and Yosuke — you're all in front." Yu looked at each of them in turn, fixing his eyes last on Yosuke.

Yosuke twirled one of his kunai around his finger. "No worries, Partner. It'll be just like the TV World!"

"If it's jus' like the TV World, Yosuke-senpai's gonna drop his knives on the floor," Kanji deadpanned.

"I fail to comprehend how dropping one's weapon is effective in combat against Shadows. Yosuke-san, can you explain how this technique functions? It may be valuable for future excursions into Tartarus."

Koromaru barked. Great, even the dog was mocking him. Yosuke was about to protest to preserve some shred of his dignity, but Yu got there first.

"Maybe another time, Aigis. Let's go. Yosuke, lead the way."

Yosuke settled for a scowl and side-eyed glance at Kanji before responding with a cheery, "You got it, Partner!" Koromaru fell into a trot behind him as they descended the stairs to the next level.

A pop tune with a catchy tempo began playing on his headphones. Yosuke tapped one of his kunai against his thigh in time with the beat. Hunting Shadows in the TV World with Yu and Chie and the rest of the Investigation Team for months had become a sort of familiar rhythm. By now Yosuke was used to the whole routine: Get into formation, keep to your position, and, if necessary, protect Yu. Everyone had their own role, and if everybody was trying their hardest, it was up to Yosuke to keep up his own pace.

"Everyone, look out. There's a small group of Shadows headed your way," Fuuka said.

Koromaru growled and Yosuke glanced around the corner. Sure enough, a half-dozen Shadows were slithering their way toward them. "Guys, there's five Shadows coming from over here. Get ready!"

They fanned out as the Shadows approached. Koromaru darted out first and sliced the closest Shadow, knife bared between his teeth, nimbly winding around the Shadows' attacks. Kanji took advantage of the confusion Koromaru created, roaring as he bludgeoned a Shadow that looked like a set of scales.

With Kanji taking care of the Shadows on the left, and Koromaru weaving through the Shadows' ranks, Yosuke decided to target the fish Shadow on the right, gripping his kunai and sprinting forward. But the fish Shadow was faster, and swerved just out of reach just before Yosuke landed his hit. Yosuke swerved, then swore, then watched as the Shadow's body was riddled with bullet holes before dissipating into the air.

"Target annihilated."

Yosuke looked back to see smoke rising from Aigis' finger… turrets? Yosuke wasn't sure he was ever going to get used to that. Beside her, and just a little back, Yu stood, watching the scene play out, sword held loosely at his side, face impassive as always. Something was off, though. Yosuke finally realized that Yu wasn't wearing his glasses, and it took Yosuke a few moments to remember that even though they were fighting Shadows, this wasn't the TV World. It took him only a few moments more to realize that a giant card soldier had come up behind Yu.

Yosuke started running toward him before he even realized what he was doing. Yu's eyes furrowed at Yosuke's berserk rush, then widened in surprise and realization when Fuuka's cries and Yosuke's panicked shout reached him. Yu spun around, gripped his sword firmly, but Yosuke had seen this scene before, could tell that Yu wouldn't be quick enough to dodge. Aigis let loose some more bullets, but that didn't impede the card soldier's advance at all, as it raised its scepter high. One, two, one, two, Yosuke's rapid footfalls matched the beat coming from his headphones until they crackled and abruptly shut off, but that hardly mattered, not when a Shadow was about to mow down his partner. Yosuke only vaguely registered Fuuka's shouts from the communication link and the yips from Koromaru growing steadily louder.

A couple more paces and he would be there. And then Yosuke tripped on something soft, something furry, heard a pained whimper from below him. Koromaru apparently had the same idea as Yosuke. That was all Yosuke had time to think about before he fell, crumpling onto the ground before the card soldier's scepter clubbed him in the chest. A cacophony of clattering kunai, a dog's growls, and Yu crying his name were all Yosuke heard before things went black.

* * *

"How are you feeling?" Yu asked.

"Never better," Yosuke grunted, moving to a slightly more upright position. Yosuke had woken up a while ago in the Nurse's Office with fractured ribs but fortunately otherwise none the worse for wear. Elizabeth had insisted Yosuke would heal faster if he had company, and offered to bring every single Persona-user to the room to cheer for his recovery. It was all Yosuke could do to convince her that only one person would be necessary, thank you — which was why Yu was currently seated in the closest chair to the bed. Yosuke decided a worse school nurse could not possibly exist. You'd think that if Elizabeth was charging for healing services, she'd be able to do a better job making his chest stop hurting. Why was she even making them pay, anyway? It's not like she uses the yen, and Yosuke could only catch her saying something about "game balance" before she declared that she was going out to get takoyaki.

Yu winced. "Sorry about earlier. I wasn't paying enough attention."

"No, don't worry about it, Partner! That's what we're here for," Yosuke laughed. "And now that there's even more of us, there's even less to worry — ow!"

Yu's eyes widened. "No, it's cool," Yosuke managed to breathe out. "Forgot laughing was against the doctor's orders." Whoever said that laughter was the best medicine had clearly never fractured their ribs before. What a jerk.

"Maybe it wasn't the best idea to put you and Koromaru in the front line together," Yu reflected.

Yosuke thought back to the events in the labyrinth and grimaced. Yu had told him everything that happened: Fuuka and Yu were preoccupied with the ongoing battle, allowing the card soldier to sneak up undetected. Yosuke and Koromaru had both rushed to protect Yu, which of course led to the Yosuke-Koromaru pile-up that resulted in Yosuke being knocked out cold. Fortunately, Kanji had just finished up with the initial pack of Shadows, and his Persona was able to hold the card soldier off long enough for Aigis to activate Orgia Mode and turn the card soldier into wood chips. Yosuke quickly decided to never piss Aigis off.

Yosuke sighed. "Yeah, we're both pretty quick, huh? I swear, I didn't even see him until I stepped on him. Could make it confusing if we're tripping over each other in a fight. You know, too much of a good thing, or whatever."

Yu looked up and Yosuke could see the gears turning in his brain, despite his face remaining placid. Then something must have clicked, because a barely perceptible smile nudged his lips upward.

"Haste makes paste," he announced.

Yosuke made a face that he was pretty sure looked like he was just slapped with a live fish. He groaned. "Come on, Partner! That was _one_ time!"

"It was insightful."

"Now you're just mocking me! It was an accident! Stop making fun of me, you ass!" Yu stood up. His face was still carefully neutral, but Yosuke knew he was laughing on the inside. "Dammit, Yu, where do you think you're going?"

"A walk."

"What?"

"I came to see if you were feeling better. It looks like you are, so I'm going out to give Koromaru a walk."

"But Koromaru isn't —"

Yu clapped his hands, and Koromaru darted out from underneath Yosuke's bed like he'd been shot from a cannon. Yosuke swore.

"Was he here the entire time?"

Koromaru barked and wagged his tail in what Yosuke guessed was an affirmative. If that dog wasn't so adorable…

"Well, I guess we're going now. Get well soon, Yosuke."

"What?" Yosuke squawked. "You can't just leave like th — grk!" Yosuke stopped mid-lunge, clutching his chest. That's right. Fractured ribs. Damn Yu. He probably planned for this to happen.

Yu turned around at the door and shook his head. "You probably shouldn't make sudden moves like that if you want to heal quickly. After all, as a great sage once told me, 'Haste makes paste.'"

"Why you —!" Yosuke grabbed the nearest throwable object (a Jack Frost plush) and hurled it toward the door, where it impacted a face with a satisfying smack.

Elizabeth's face. Crap.

"Oh my, feeling feisty, are we? I'm happy to see you're getting your energy back!" Elizabeth's eyes gleamed. Yosuke's heart sank. "You know, I tried all the takoyaki at the culture festival, but just could not find any of them that had _that_ ," Elizabeth said, tapping her index finger against her cheek. "I made a few different recipes to try and simulate _that_ , but I'm not sure if they work or not. I originally had Theo try them, but he excused himself to the facilities, looking rather green."

Elizabeth pouted. "It's a shame he won't be able to taste them. But I've also heard that it's important for sick patients to eat to get their strength back. So," Elizabeth continued, twirling around and presenting a tray of takoyaki with a flourish, "why don't I give them to you instead?"

Yosuke found the tray shoved in front of his face, and Elizabeth's eyes looking expectantly at him. He looked back down at the takoyaki. What was that pink stringy-looking thing? Why was this one green? Were those … insect legs?

He was going to murder Yu.

* * *

The defeated Shadow let out a wail before vanishing into mist. Yosuke pulled his headphones off, the music flowing out unsteadily, then wiped his kunai against his pant leg. Those rock Shadows were getting awfully common, and since they were only weak to electricity, there wasn't much he could do. Luckily, Yu could wield lightning, and in foresight that bordered on a sixth sense, had included Akihiko up front and Ken in the back, both of whom were obviously as used to casting Zio spells as breathing. Teddie rounded out the group in front, eagerly bouncing two or three paces ahead, relegating Yosuke to healing and pitching in whenever he could in back.

The headphones around his neck skipped tracks. Not that Yosuke was complaining, but wouldn't Yukiko or the girl in pink (Yukari, right?) be better suited to this? The last time he had focused on healing, the Investigation Team had been just him and Yu bumbling through Yukiko's Castle. Wow, had it been that long already? They'd come a long way since then. The Investigation Team could now field almost enough players for a baseball team. Or, at least, a pretty sorry-looking one. But it didn't really matter whether it was Yosuke or anyone else handling medical duties: if Yu thought that Yosuke was suited to healing on this expedition, that meant he trusted Yosuke to get the job done. And Yosuke wasn't about to let his Partner down, whether it was in the TV World or wherever the hell this place was.

"You shouldn't wipe your kunai on your pants, Yosuke-san." Yosuke glanced over to see Ken looking up at him with a severe expression. "You'll stain the fabric of your pants. And you'll also dull the blade. It'll be harder to kill Shadows that way," Ken informed him.

Yosuke stared. This kid was what, barely eleven years old? He talked as if he was at least fifty.

"Well, I haven't been using 'em that much. I've been meaning to ask Yu to buy me a new pair after we're done, anyway."

"It's still a bad idea," Ken pressed on. "You never know when you may need the ones you already have. Also, we don't know how big a supply of funds we can find here. We shouldn't spend on things if we don't need them, especially since Elizabeth-san charges for her healing services. It would be bad to leave someone hurt because we don't have money."

Yosuke groaned inwardly. Was he being lectured on money management by a grade schooler? The kid was probably already saving his allowance for retirement.

"What, do you count change in your spare time or something?" Yosuke scowled. "Why are you even worried about it? Shouldn't kids your age be watching Featherman?"

"I'm not a kid!" Ken pouted. Unfortunately for him, that just succeeded in making his baby face look even more baby-like. "And I don't watch Featherman, I just sit with the others at the dorm when they watch!"

" _Right_." Yosuke decided that the conversation wasn't worth the effort and changed subjects. "So, uh, when you guys are exploring — Tartarus, right? — who does the healing support?"

The question seemed to mollify Ken a bit, though he still looked like a cat whose fur had been rubbed the wrong way. Wait, had he just compared Ken to a cat? Yosuke groaned inwardly again. Yu was rubbing off on him too much. Add that to the list of reasons why Yosuke was going to murder Yu.

"Well, Akihiko-san and I know a little recovery magic. And our leader pitches in a bit, too, when he has the right Personas. But it's really Yukari-san who's the best at it. You know," Ken remarked, as if he just realized the answer to an exam question, "she uses Garu spells, too. Just like you, Yosuke-san."

Yosuke didn't think there was a link between wind and healing. Then again, it's not as if he knew a million Persona users. "I guess. I'm honestly more used to fighting on the front lines instead of healing, y'know?"

Ken looked surprised. "Oh, really? Even though you both use Garu, you're much quicker than Yukari-san. I think that's why Mitsuru-san thought it would be good for you to help with healing."

Now it was Yosuke's turn to look surprised. "Huh? Mitsuru said that? When?"

"Earlier, before we came into the Group Date Cafe. She and Yu-san were talking together."

Yosuke's eyebrows shot up to his hairline. Had the Ladies' Man of Inaba struck again? It had only been — okay, so time was hard to keep track of when the only clock they had never moved, but Yosuke was sure it couldn't have been more than a couple of days. That was a new speed record, even for Yu. Why couldn't Yu's magic pixie dust, or whatever he used, rub off on Yosuke for once? Yosuke mentally added "Yu won't share his magic chick magnet dust" as another reason to murder Yu. Well, it was already on the list, but now it was number one.

"That sly dog… Just the two of them?" Yosuke whistled.

Ken shook his head. "No, it wasn't just them. Zen-san and our lea — uh, the vice leader, were there too. I think they were talking about strategy to get through this labyrinth."

"What? That's the kind of thing you mention first! You don't want to give a guy the wrong impression!"

Ken looked confused. "Huh? I don't understand. What impression is that?"

"I agree. What impression is that?" Yu asked. From six centimeters behind Yosuke.

Yosuke was certain he launched into orbit. "Man, don't just sneak up on people like that!" Yosuke finally managed, after returning to the ground. "I know you're part cat, but save it for the Shadows!"

Yu looked offended. "I can't help it. I'm only following my feline instincts."

"Well, find a way to tone it down or something. We already have a bear, a dog, and Chie. We don't need a cat!"

"Come on, Yosuke-san. There's no way a human could also be a cat," Ken said authoritatively.

"See, Yosuke? Nobody can tell," Yu said. He tutted. "And you said I couldn't hide my tail."

Yosuke rolled his eyes. "Stop messing around."

"I'm only doing what cats do best," Yu protested.

"You can't be serious. Everyone knows humans and cats are totally different," Ken said in a huff. Actually, Ken would have made a pretty good example, since he was wearing that ruffled-cat look again. Yosuke tried not to notice. "Are you trying to make fun of me?" Ken added, indignantly.

Yu shrugged. "Not at all. I can't talk about that, anyway. It's a secret."

Ken's eyes narrowed. "You're lying. Something like that could never happen."

Yu counted on his fingers. "A dog that can use a Persona, a secret time of day that only appears to Persona-users, a human who's also part cat. Who's to say which is crazy?"

"But… But…" Ken stammered.

Yosuke could very nearly pinpoint the second that the poor kid's brain broke. Yosuke probably should've said something earlier, but that ship had already left and was halfway across the ocean by now. Besides, he had a more pressing question: Yu and Mitsuru.

"So you were talking with Mitsuru earlier?"

"Hm? I was."

Yosuke gave him a celebratory slap on the back. Yu jumped. Serves him right, for sneaking up on Yosuke earlier. "Man, Yu, the streak continues! How do you charm all the ladies so fast?"

"What?" Yu looked at him, confused, then realized. "Oh, no. It's not like that. We were just talking about strategy."

Yosuke elbowed him lightly. "Right, definitely a study session," he said, winking and waving his fingers in air quotes.

"No, really," Yu said. "She wanted to meet before we entered the Group Date Cafe again. Since Minato's vice leader and Zen knows more about the labyrinths than any of us, they came too." Then, Yu added in a confidential whisper, "Besides, Yosuke. You know my heart already belongs to the orange tabby that hangs out by the Samegawa."

Behind him, Ken choked on something. Yosuke brought his palm to his face and groaned inwardly for the third time. "Dude, I'm your best friend, and sometimes I can't even tell when you're joking."

"Sorry," Yu said, smiling. He didn't look sorry. Smug bastard.

"So you're not together?"

Yu shook his head. "We were just talking about tactics."

Alright, so maybe there were some girls that Yu couldn't get to fall head over heels for him. Apparently, Yu's magic pixie dust wasn't perfect. Still, if they weren't meeting because Mitsuru wanted to get in his pants, and they were actually talking strategy, complete with Minato and even Zen — _Zen!_ — then that left another question niggling at the back of Yosuke's mind.

"Anyway, so you had a strategy meeting. Why didn't you —"

"Senpai!" Rise interrupted. "I'm sensing a whole bunch of Shadows heading this direction!"

"Dammit, Teddie Teddie! I told you not to run off by yourself!"

"Ah! Yosuke! Sensei! Akky's being mean to me! And there's a bunch of Shadows headed this way!"

Yosuke whirled around to see Akihiko sprinting toward them, with Teddie close behind, running as fast as his stubby bear legs could carry him. And behind them… Yosuke blanched. There were easily enough Shadows for a small army, and Yosuke could even pick out one or two of the big ones on horses they'd been trying to avoid. Yosuke almost had to give Teddie credit for managing to successfully enrage so many of them. Almost. "Dammit, Ted! You couldn't tell us the part about the Shadows first?"

Akihiko made it within talking distance and eagerly got into a fighting stance. "So," he said with a battle grin that unsettled Yosuke more than he would ever admit. "What's the plan, Leader?"

Rise piped up. "Senpai, there's about twenty regular Shadows and two F.O.E.s. I'm scanning them now, and… A lot of them look weak to light. Some are weak to wind, too."

Yu glanced at Ken. "Do you have enough energy left for Hama?"

Ken nodded, but looked uncertain. "I think so. But I can only target one Shadow at a time."

"There's just too many for single attacks to be effective," Rise interrupted. "You need something that can hit them all at once, or you'll be overrun."

Yosuke's brain went into overdrive. Did they have any group attacks? Teddie did, but it was a weak Mabufu. And Yosuke had wind attacks at his disposal, but nothing that could hit more than one Shadow at once. That would hardly put a dent in the swarm of Shadows headed toward them.

Which meant they really only had one option.

"Yosuke!" It looked like Yu had reached the same conclusion. Yu summoned Izanagi and let loose a Zio that obliterated a Shadow in a single hit.

"On it, Partner!" Yosuke leapt back to their supply bag and desperately started searching for a Goho-M while uttering a string of profanities that surely would have landed him in detention if Yosuke was actually at school. Akihiko had already engaged the closest Shadow in combat, while a Mabufu from Teddie coated the nearest Shadows in frost, slowing their advance.

"Yosuke-senpai, look out!" Rise's voice was in his head, and Yosuke glanced up, only to see a Shadow leaping straight at him — then vanish in an instant as Ken's Hama found its mark. That was close.

"Got it!" Yosuke grabbed at a Goho-M, and in a flash of light, all five of them found themselves back in the halls of the alternate Yasogami High, right outside the Group Date Cafe.

"We could have taken them," Akihiko sighed.

Yosuke would have protested if he hadn't just seen his life flash before his eyes. He let out a breath that he hadn't realized he was holding. He looked toward Yu. "Next time," he panted, "tell Mitsuru that we should include someone with group attacks."

Yu stared at him, then nodded.

Teddie gasped, then, in a voice full of admiration, said, "Sensei! Did you really score with Mit-chan?"

Yosuke groaned. This time, out loud.

* * *

After everyone had recovered from their ordeal, Yosuke chewed Teddie out big-time, and swore that he'd make him take all the double shifts at Junes as soon as they got back. That meant Teddie had followed him around for the next half-hour, begging and pleading and crying and clinging to Yosuke's leg, forcing Yosuke to drag Teddie around the school until he finally had enough of both the bear's wailing and everyone else's amused expressions (but definitely not sympathetic, Yosuke observed bitterly), and wound up promising Teddie that if he was good — really, exceptionally well-behaved — Yosuke might, _might_ , change his mind. Of course, _that_ meant Teddie spent the next half-hour after that praising Yosuke and thanking Yosuke and swearing that he would claw his way up to meet Yosuke's expectations. Which was honestly just as annoying as when Teddie attached himself to Yosuke's leg and just wouldn't let the hell go. After enduring more and more promises, ranging from "all the Topsicles" to "helping Yosuke score" (Yosuke was very sure he didn't want Teddie's help with that), Yosuke finally managed to escape into an empty classroom and find some peace.

He sighed. How had he let the Investigation Team rope him into keeping Teddie at his place again? The bear was helpful in the dungeons, sure, but he was the single most obnoxious thing on the planet, even more than the birds right outside Yosuke's window that started chirping at four in the morning, or Yu stopping to feed every single stray cat on the way home from school. Then taking pictures of them. Then petting them. Then rescuing them from stranding themselves on the side of the riverbank, and guilting Yosuke into helping.

Speaking of Yu. He was leading another expedition into the Group Date Cafe, this time with Yukari handling healing duties and Naoto probably making mincemeat of Shadows with her Mahama and Mamudo. He hadn't included Yosuke this time, telling him he wanted to try some new strategies and that Yosuke needed the rest anyway.

Yosuke fiddled with his music player. The thing had been uncooperative during some of the recent fights, shutting off suddenly with no warning or distorting the music almost beyond recognition. Of course it would have to go bad while they were in — wherever they were. Maybe Theodore could make a new player if he asked. Yeah, right. More likely, he'd have to buy a new one from Junes after they got back to Inaba. There went another paycheck. Yosuke grunted in frustration and kicked the nearest desk.

"Damaging property violates school rules."

"Gah!" Yosuke spun around. It was Minato. He hadn't even so much as glanced in Yosuke's direction, instead opting to lean up against the far wall and gaze disinterestedly out the window toward the clock tower. His earbuds were in, and now that Yosuke was listening for it, he could hear faint pulses of electrical music steadily emanating, which meant that they must have been going full blast. Wait. How had Minato even heard him like that? Did all Wild Cards have psychic powers or something?

"Um, how long have you been here?" Yosuke ventured.

"It's quiet," Minato responded, without bothering to turn around. That… didn't actually answer his question.

"So. What, uh. What are you, er, doing here?"

Minato didn't budge, leaving only the sound of the song playing on his music player to steadily float through the room. Yosuke brushed his hands against his pants. Then stuffed them in his pockets. Then unstuffed them and meticulously examined his uniform's hemline. The song continued. Minato continued looking out the window. Yosuke continued fidgeting uncomfortably. As if sensing the awkward atmosphere, the music abruptly shifted from its previously upbeat tune to a soft whine, before fizzling out into nothingness completely.

"Um," Yosuke offered lamely.

Silence. Yosuke squirmed. The stillness was agonizing. Finally, the next song on Minato's player mercifully queued up. This time, a heavy bass line pounded through the room, continually rocked by intervals of a booming timpani. English lyrics burst out at a steady pace, layering the percussion with depth. Yosuke couldn't recognize them (English was his most-hated class — okay, he hated math more, but English was a close second), but even so, the sheer power the words carried was unmistakable. The entire song just emanated a raw force, one that could stop people in their tracks. Hell, it could probably knock back more than a couple of Shadows.

"Hey," Minato said.

Yosuke started, and found Minato standing a few paces in front of him. When had he walked over? Yosuke had already made peace with the fact that Yu had the stealth of a ninja, but he didn't know if he could handle _two_ people continually creeping up on him without him noticing.

"Uh, sorry. Did you say something? I kind of, um, got caught up in the beat."

Minato arched an eyebrow, the one not rendered invisible by the ridiculous mop of hair covering half his face. He glanced down at Yosuke's foot, which was still tapping away to the music with the rhythm of a metronome and the ferocity of a jackhammer. Yosuke willed it to stop.

"Er, don't mind me! It's just, uh, music's kind of my thing. You know, you just listen and it pushes all the right buttons for you? Flips a switch and just turns you on?" Yosuke let out a strained laugh. Then he saw Minato's raised eyebrow and immediately wanted to strangle himself. "Wait, _no_ , that's not what I meant! It's just that —"

"I understand," Minato said simply.

Yosuke took in a breath to calm himself, then nodded. "Yeah, you get it, right? There's just something about a good tune that can get you focused. I listen to music all the time in the TV World to keep me pumped up. Heh, you probably listen to some great songs when you're beating the crap out of Shadows too, huh?"

"Machines don't work during the Dark Hour."

"Oh."

Minato didn't offer anything further, and the room went awkwardly silent. Again. Minato must have turned off his music. Yosuke decided that whenever the Investigation Team caught the culprit, there would be no torture worse than sticking him in a room alone with Minato. Talking with Minato was like trying to talk to a vending machine that never dropped any drinks no matter how much yen you put in the damn thing.

Yosuke reached for his own music player, anything to break the silence, but it refused to even turn on. Yosuke grumbled wordlessly. Yosuke never liked the quiet. Especially awkward quiet, and there was more awkward quiet in this room than in the Group Date Cafe. Awkward quiet was the worst. How did Yu always know the right thing to say at times like this? Yosuke always just said the first thing that came to mind, and that always got him galactic punted, but the awkward silence was getting more and more painful by the second, and —

"What's it like leading expeditions in Tartarus?" Yosuke finally blurted out. That was safe, right? Please be safe.

Minato looked at him with bored eyes. Or, eyes that were just as bored as they always looked. "Long," he said, and that was it.

Yosuke flailed around for another question. "Are the Shadows tough?"

"Sometimes."

"Um. You do healing much?"

"Sometimes," Minato repeated, dully.

Maybe Minato had a curse placed on him as a child. One where, if he ever spoke more than fifty words a day, he would transform into a chicken. Or a toad. Or a rock. Rocks didn't speak. Minato'd probably like that.

"Do you have a second-in-command?" The words tumbled out of Yosuke's mouth before he could stop them.

Minato shook his head. "Not really."

Yosuke considered it a good sign that Minato had moved from one-word responses to two. Baby steps.

"Does that make it harder?" Yosuke continued on, trying hard to keep the conversation going, but also kind of really wanting to know the answer. "Fighting Shadows, I mean."

Minato shrugged. "I've never had one, so I wouldn't know."

Silence fell again. Well, so much for that. Yosuke agonized over what to say, when —

"But I think Yu's glad to have someone he can rely on."

Yosuke recalled all the times he'd called Yu right after the Midnight Channel aired, the two discussing their next steps and vowing a rescue. He remembered Ken telling him about Yu and Mitsuru and Zen and Minato, all meeting before every expedition into a labyrinth.

"Well, yeah!" Yosuke almost shouted. "Who wouldn't want another Wild Card as their backup? Or even someone like Mitsuru to take advice from?"

Minato raised an eyebrow again. "…I was talking about you."

"Huh?"

"You're his second-in-command. Aren't you?" Minato said, like that was a fact.

"I mean, yeah, but! Here, there's… Well, it's like, I don't know, y'know?" Minato was staring at him in bemused interest, as if Minato had just walked in on Yosuke in the middle of that stupid cross-dressing pageant. God, he wasn't making any sense, not even to himself. For not the first time, Yosuke wished he could form sentences like normal people. What came out instead was a long, pained, "Aughhhhhh."

"Hey," Minato interrupted Yosuke's flailing. "Want to know what I think?"

Yosuke shook his head and sighed. "No, dude, don't worry about it." He fiddled with the cord to his headphones. "Sorry you, uh, had to see me like this. I'll be fine."

"Okay."

Minato turned his music player back on, and the bass-heavy song from before picked up from where it left off.

"Hey, at least do me a favor and don't tell Yu about this, okay? Wouldn't want him freaking out, or thinking I'm…" Yosuke trailed off.

"Talk to Mitsuru."

"Huh?"

"Talk to Mitsuru," Minato repeated, looking directly at Yosuke despite the music that must have been beating his eardrums into tiny fragments. "And I won't tell Yu."

"No, I heard — but why?"

"Thought it might help."

"Yeah, how about no," Yosuke shook his head. "She's like, on a whole different level!"

"Okay. So I'll talk to Yu, then."

"What? No!" Yosuke flailed. "You can't do that!"

"Okay. So you'll talk to Mitsuru, then."

"I saw what she did to Teddie! I can barely talk to Chie without getting kicked in the face! I know I'm gonna piss Mitsuru off! And if I piss Mitsuru off, she'll…!"

"Execution," Minato murmured.

"Right! You get it!"

Minato shrugged. "Then don't piss her off."

Yosuke glared at Minato. He wished Jiraiya could have granted him the power to kill people with his eyes, because Minato would have evaporated right there, ridiculous hair and all. And then Yosuke could also pocket his music player and have one that actually worked for once.

"You're a real jerk, you know that?"

Another shrug was Minato's only response before he casually strolled out of the classroom without so much as even giving Yosuke a backward glance. Yosuke listened to the bass vanish down the hall before finally being left in total silence in the dimly lit room. Yosuke held his head in his hands.

"Aughhhhhh," Yosuke said.

* * *

Yosuke emerged, finally, to find neither Minato nor Teddie (Yosuke didn't know which would be worse at this point) in sight, although he could recognize a few S.E.E.S. members milling around. Evidently, Yu and his team hadn't returned yet — if they had, everyone would be gathered outside the Group Date Cafe waiting for Yu to assign roles in the next expedition.

It wasn't that way in the TV World. There was no aimless waiting, no worrying over whether there were enough people venturing into the dungeon to be safe. With only eight Persona-users at their disposal, everyone went into the TV together. Everyone fell into a role. Lead the exploration. Protect Rise. Back up the leader. Scan for Shadows' weaknesses. Stay in back for support. Every task was defined, even if all Yu had to say was, "Yosuke, with me," or "Yosuke, you're in back." Each time, Yu trusted him, Yosuke, to complete that role, just as he trusted the other members of the Investigation Team to complete theirs. And that was constant, just as constant as the pumping adrenaline that filled Yosuke's body as he sliced through a Shadow with his kunai, or the gale that ruffled his hair whenever he summoned Jiraiya, or the pounding beats that bounced from his headphones and kept him focused.

Yosuke wandered aimlessly down the hall. It was different in this other Yasogami High. The entire experience fighting Shadows was different. There was none of the panicked urgency of reaching the end of a dungeon before the fog set in. But there was also none of the rest that came with sleeping in your own bed (even if Teddie snored like a foghorn and kept waking Yosuke up in the middle of the night because of another night- _bear_ ). The entire Investigation Team was here, but so was S.E.E.S., and that was something different too. Even the construction of this haven in the rift, as Margaret had so cryptically put it, managed to be confoundingly unfamiliar in the most basic ways. Most obviously different were the Clock Tower and barren schoolyard, of course — not to mention the front gates that mysteriously warped you right next to the okonomiyaki stand whenever you so much as thought about trying to leave. But there were also the staircases that seemed far too long to go up just one floor, or odd classroom exhibits Yosuke hadn't remembered seeing, or classrooms that shouldn't even exist at all. (Yosuke wasn't the superstitious type. But nobody could explain how a fourth classroom had somehow inserted itself on each floor, and at this point he would be surprised if something paranormal _wasn't_ behind it.)

Everything here belonged so definitely to Yasogami High, and at the same time, everything was so definitely different from Yasogami High. Yosuke felt a stranger in a place he should have been able to call home, or at least something like home, even with Kashiwagi's constant flirting with her students. And as he turned the corner and found himself in a hallway he didn't recognize, filled with faces he didn't recognize talking about things he didn't recognize, Yosuke realized that here, in this Yasogami High and its den of labyrinths and crowds of Persona-users, he was lost. The hallways were teeming with shadowy students, but Yosuke couldn't identify any of them.

He finally spotted Zen in the midst of the crowd.

"Yo, Zen! What're you doing all the way out here?" Yosuke called out.

"Ah, hello, Yosuke. I am here to purchase the takoyaki Rei likes best," Zen said, gesturing to a stall quashed between a drink stand to the right and a stand on the left with a gaudy "Extra-large ice cream special! Can you eat it all?!?!" sign plastered on top. And if Zen was here…

"Zen! This is soooo good!" Rei made her way out of a cloud of students, holding a pair of takoyaki skewers in her left hand. In her right were three more skewers where takoyaki probably used to be. How she was able to talk through the octopus and fried dough — well, that would probably remain as mysterious as the bottom of Aiya's rainy day beef bowl. "Oh, it's Yo-chan! You should come over and have some takoyaki with us!"

"Indeed," Zen added. "It is quite good takoyaki."

Memories of the takoyaki Elizabeth forced him to eat surfaced in Yosuke's mind. His stomach flipped. "You know what, I think I'm good."

"Really? You're missing out, Yosuke! This stuff really is great!" Chie appeared behind Rei, holding a skewer of her own. Apparently, Yosuke had wandered into the most popular area in the whole school without realizing it.

"Are you sure? It's the best takoyaki in the whole wide world!" Rei continued. She waved a skewer in Yosuke's face, which sent waves of oil and batter through the air, which sent waves of nausea through Yosuke.

"No!" Yosuke shuddered. "Er, I mean, it's fine! I just ate and…"

"Oh well! More for me!" Rei giggled, then downed an entire skewer of takoyaki in one bite. How… was that even possible? "Hey, Zen! Can we get another? Can we, please?"

"Of course. I will be only a moment," Zen said before vanishing into the crowd.

"So, Yosuke! If you're not here for the takoyaki, what'd you come out here for?" Chie asked.

"Uh." Yosuke wasn't about to admit he got lost in his own high school — and definitely not to Chie. "I, um, oh! I was looking for Theodore! My music player's been on the fritz, so I was thinking maybe he could fix it. He wasn't in the workshop, so I came out here looking for him."

"Really?" Chie cocked her head. "I was just there and he was talking about how he was waiting for Elizabeth to come by with food. It's strange that he would just up and leave. Although," she stopped and thought. "Now that I think about it, he didn't seem too happy about it."

"Well, he was gone when I got there!" Yosuke snapped. "And if I were him, I'd want to get the hell out of there too!"

"Jeez, Yosuke, you don't have to get all upset about it! I was just making an observation."

"What? Why would you leave if there was going to be food?" Rei said in between bites of a doughnut that hadn't been there a second ago. All five takoyaki skewers were now empty and being held in her left hand. "I'd stay until the cows came home and made delicious hamburgers!"

"Let's just say he probably doesn't trust Elizabeth's cooking," Yosuke managed. "Anyway, what are you doing here?"

Chie looked at Yosuke as if she was trying to make a penguin understand her. Which meant that Yosuke said something stupid. "Whaddya mean? I'm here for the takoyaki! We're all waiting for Yu to get back, so we went and got something to eat! It's never good to go exploring on an empty stomach!" Chie smiled knowingly, as if she were a sage in one of her kung-fu movies giving advice to a new trainee. Advice noted. "Why don't you just wait until Theodore gets back instead of wandering around like a lost puppy? It's not like anybody's going anywhere."

"Yeah, well, it bugs me when it's not working right." Yosuke twirled the cord between his fingers. "It keeps skipping tracks or messing with the tempo. I just like having it there in case I need it, you know?"

"What kind of music do you like, Yo-chan?"

"Uh, a little bit of everything, I guess? I'll listen to anything, as long as it's composed well and has a good rhythm to it."

"So you never heard a song you didn't like?" The doughnut had disappeared, replaced with a bag of fried squid. "That's amazing! It's like how I've never met a pizza I didn't like!"

Chie rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right. It's more like Yosuke'll listen to anything, no matter if it's good or not."

"And how would you know?" Yosuke bristled. "It's not like you even listen to music. You're too busy shouting and kicking people or whatever!"

"Hey! It's _not_ kicking people, only people who make idiots of themselves, like you! And I'll have you know I just got a new CD a couple of weeks ago!"

Yosuke scoffed. "Yeah, and what was it? 'The Trial of the Dragon' soundtrack?" Chie deflated. Bingo.

"Well, at least I don't freak out the moment my music player stops working."

"What? I'm not freaking out!"

Chie gave him the penguin look. "Are you serious? You were just talking about looking for Theodore because you couldn't wait until he got back! Sometimes I wonder if you could live a day without it."

"I totally could!" Yosuke totally couldn't.

"I know I couldn't live a day without food!" Rei chimed in. The squid had transformed into potato chips.

"Rei-chan, I don't think _anyone_ wants to do that," Yosuke said.

"Zen! You're back!" Rei jumped up and skipped to where Zen was returning, several takoyaki skewers in hand.

"Yes, I've returned. Here is the takoyaki for you, Rei. And you as well, Chie."

"Aw, thanks, Zen-kun! You're the best!" Chie gushed. Rei was already munching on some of the takoyaki, making sounds that could probably be deciphered as "thank you" if Yosuke listened hard enough. "It was such a good idea to come here, Rei-chan!"

Rei nodded. "Of course! I know all the best places to eat!"

"Really? You'll have to show us all around sometime!" Chie said. "Hey, is there anywhere that has a good beef bowl? I'm dying for some meat!"

The two began chattering. Yosuke turned to Zen.

"Have you decided that you would like takoyaki after all?" Zen asked.

"Er, no," Yosuke said, willing his stomach to stop doing acrobatics. He scratched the nape of his neck, fingers finding the cord to his headphones, then twining around it. "So, how's it going? With, uh, everything?"

"Rei and I have been doing well. Rei seems especially pleased with the takoyaki. I must admit that I enjoy it as well, though seeing Rei happy pleases me the most."

Ask a vague question, get an answer about takoyaki, Yosuke supposed. Yosuke got the sinking feeling that this conversation was going to be more painful than Minato's.

"Uh. I was actually thinking more of the, y'know, labyrinths?"

"Ah. Rei is still frightened of them, of course. But we both feel that exploring them is important, so we will continue on. Whatever happens, I have sworn to protect Rei. I vow no harm will come to her, so please do not feel hesitant to continue on our behalf."

"Er, sure thing." Yosuke struggled to suppress an exasperated sigh. He could only take so many awkward conversations in a single day. Yosuke already had firsthand experience with Minato's allergic reaction to conversation, and Zen was as dense as a rock, and not one of the weird ones that floated in water. Conversations with Yu were starting to look normal, and that was terrifying.

He could hear Rei and Chie's excited voices — evidently, Rei wanted to challenge the Rainy Day Beef Bowl. Yosuke prayed that she wouldn't, because he was sure Aiya's would go out of business if she did. Yosuke turned back to Zen and decided to just plunge in the deep end. "Minato told me you've been meeting with Mitsuru to talk about the labyrinths," he announced.

"That's correct," Zen said. He didn't elaborate further.

Yosuke tried again. "So how has that been going? Do you remember anything?"

Zen shook his head. "Neither Rei nor I remember anything specific. However, there are some times when we have… How would one describe them? Visions, perhaps. No, it is probably more akin to foresight. A forewarning of what the labyrinth may appear as, or awareness of the labyrinths' inhabitants. To be sure, it is nothing very detailed, and I am unsure myself as to whether they are helpful. However, Mitsuru seems to believe they are beneficial, so I am happy to share what I know, vague though it may be, if it has the potential to offer you any value."

"Mitsuru thinks it's helpful?"

"I believe so. She has asked me to share any information I have in an effort to hasten the exploration of the labyrinths."

"Yeah, that's what Minato said," Yosuke said, turning his head back toward Chie and Rei, who were walking off toward the takoyaki stand, apparently getting thirds. Or fourths, whatever they were on now. He absently reached up to clutch his headphones with his free hand, the one that wasn't curling and uncurling and curling around his headphone cord. "Do you and Mitsuru talk about this much?"

Zen nodded. "That is the case. We speak immediately before embarking on an expedition through a labyrinth."

"Well, Mitsuru's probably grateful for the help," Yosuke grumbled. "And Yu, too."

Zen tilted his head, then smiled. "Thank you, Yosuke. But it is the least we can do to help. If there is anything at all Rei and I can do to help you and your friends to return to your homes, we would be happy to do our part to help."

"Actually, there might be something," Youske said, before he could psych himself out by thinking too hard about it.

"Of course. Allow me to fetch Rei." Zen turned around, and Yosuke nearly leapt forward to stop him.

"Wait, wait!" Yosuke yelped. "Just you, actually."

Zen turned back, fully facing Yosuke. Behind him, Chie appeared to be waving off another takoyaki skewer. Yosuke couldn't tell if these were the same ones as before or new ones entirely. If they were new ones, that would put Rei's total so far at something like fifteen skewers. Yosuke shuddered at the thought.

Zen spoke. "I see. Very well. What can I help with?"

Yosuke looked down at his shoes, clasped his headphones and moved to take them off from around his neck, then realized what he was doing and put them back. Well, he had come this far. Might as well go through with it.

"It's Mitsuru," Yosuke finally managed. Zen stared at him blankly. "I need to talk to Mitsuru," Yosuke clarified.

"I do not understand. Why can you not simply speak with Mitsuru?"

Yosuke ran a hand through what he was sure was rapidly graying hair. If this continued much longer, he'd have to get a bowl cut. He didn't think he could pull off the bowl cut look.

"It's complicated," Yosuke said.

"Do not worry about trying my patience. I will listen for however long you wish to explain."

Yosuke groaned. Why couldn't Zen just take a freaking hint? "Just, look. I need to talk to Mitsuru. You all meet up before going out and exploring labyrinths, right? I want to help with all that. So take me to talk with her."

"I see," Zen said, and nodded in understanding. "Very well, I will ask you to accompany me next time we commence planning."

"Wait, really?" Yosuke stammered. That was… easy. If Chie was here, Yosuke was dead certain that she'd be giving him the penguin look right now.

Zen frowned. "Is there something the matter?"

"No! No no no, not at all!" Yosuke hastily replied. He hadn't actually expected Zen to say yes so readily — not with Yosuke's luck anyway. "That's fine! Er, better than fine! It's great!"

Zen nodded. "I am pleased to hear that. I will be sure to seek you out the next time Mitsuru requests my assistance."

"Yeah, okay. Right. Thanks," Yosuke fumbled out. It couldn't just be that easy. Getting here was painful, of course, what with the fractured ribs, and the stomach-churning takoyaki, and Minato and Zen's… well, everything about speaking to Minato and Zen was painful. But Zen had agreed with so little convincing that Yosuke couldn't help feeling a little optimistic. A fast-paced electronic song fizzled to life from Yosuke's headphones, weakly, then died again. Maybe, just maybe, things were looking up.

* * *

Yosuke had made a horrible, horrible mistake.

"Hanamura. What are you doing here?" Mitsuru demanded, eyes like needles and Yosuke like the pincushion. Yosuke thought this was probably what Shadows felt like when she gored them with her rapier.

"Er! I'm, uh!" Yosuke said, eloquently. In all of Yosuke's giddiness, he had forgotten that he still actually had to talk to Mitsuru, and he had forgotten how absolutely terrifying that was.

Mitsuru apparently decided that she was done with waiting, and turned her gaze on Zen. "Zen, please explain," she announced. Yosuke didn't know whether to sigh in relief or despair. On the one hand, Yosuke was no longer the victim of a stabbing. On the other hand, Yosuke had apparently forgotten how to speak. Real impressive, Yosuke.

"Yosuke has offered to assist in making preparations for the labyrinths," Zen explained. "He expressed the desire to accompany me when we next met, as he seemed uncomfortable speaking to you alone."

Yosuke winced. Zen wasn't wrong, but did he have to say it like that?

"Is that so, Hanamura?"

"Eep!" Yosuke quailed. Mitsuru's eyes sharpened. "Er! I mean, kinda! A little. Yes."

Mitsuru looked him up and down imperiously, as if she was a teacher who had just demanded Yosuke tell her what year the capitol moved from Kyoto to Edo. Yosuke shrank. Normally, Yu would save Yosuke by whispering the answer. Yosuke glanced around. Other than Mitsuru, the only other person here was Zen. Yosuke was so screwed.

"Very well," Mitsuru pronounced. "I am open to considering the possibility. We all desire to leave this place, and perhaps having additional perspectives during our planning sessions will expedite our escape."

Yosuke could hardly believe his ears. "S-seriously?"

Mitsuru nodded. "Of course. In our current situation, it would be foolish of me to discard assistance out of hand. Now, please, Hanamura. Tell me, what is your area of expertise? Combat? Exploration? Resource allocation?"

"H-huh?"

Mitsuru frowned. "I am asking about your strengths, Hanamura. I wish to avoid redundancies and ensure efficient discussion. To do so, I need an accurate accounting of your skills. Do you understand?"

Yosuke nodded his head vigorously.

"Good. Please continue."

"Right!" Yosuke warbled nervously, and crap, that came out even less confidently than he felt. How was that possible? He wasn't prepared for a presentation in front of the entire class. Yosuke was good at talking, not talking coherently.

"Hanamura," Mitsuru prodded, impatiently.

"Ahem. Well," Yosuke started, shifting his weight from foot to foot and adjusting the headphones around his neck. "I guess I'm pretty quick. So I can land the first hit during battles. And, uh, there's Jiraiya. He's my Persona. He uses wind, and that's pretty —"

"Do you take me for a fool, Hanamura?" Mitsuru interrupted. Her tone was icy, and her eyes were icy, and Yosuke got the distinct impression that the air had chilled twenty degrees. He regretted thinking it was funny when Mitsuru turned Teddie into an ice cube. "I ask that you not waste my time. I am aware of your speed, as well as your perennial lack of luck."

Had his defining characteristic really become his perpetual unluckiness?

"I am very much cognizant of your combat capabilities. If awareness of one's own abilities is all that is necessary to formulate a plan of action for our combined forces, then I could invite Koromaru to join us in our planning sessions. Are you suggesting that I do so?"

"Well, when you put it that way…" Yosuke cringed.

"I appreciate your offer of assistance, Hanamura. But if I am to take it seriously, I require some distinct knowledge that is unavailable elsewhere. If your offer is nothing more than the recitation of commonly known information, then it is nothing more than _un beau geste_."

"…A bow just what, now?"

"A beautiful gesture," Mitsuru answered. "An offer that appears grand but is fundamentally meaningless."

Ouch. Yosuke liked the phrase better when Mitsuru hadn't translated it for him. He gazed down at the floorboards. Like hell Mitsuru was going to listen to him after this, Zen would only understand when snow bunnies could live in hell, and Minato was just an asshole. And Yosuke wouldn't be caught dead confiding about this to Yu. Zero for four. Could this fiasco possibly have gone any more catastrophically?

"I'll just, uh…" Yosuke trailed off, and turned around, and came face-to-face with Yu.

Ask and you shall receive, Yosuke thought grimly.

"Yosuke? I didn't expect to see you here," Yu said, surprised. Standing next to him was Minato, who Yosuke was very sure was not at all surprised, and even as Yosuke watched, flashed Yosuke a smirk. Then, just as instantly, his face was blank as always. Damn Wild Cards.

Zen spoke up. "Yosuke has offered to —"

Yosuke scrambled to cut him off. "No no no no no, there's nothing to explain!" Yosuke floundered. "Absolutely just total random chance! I was just leaving, actually!"

Yu looked at him skeptically. Okay, so that wasn't the most convincing lie Yosuke had ever told, but he was desperate, and frankly Yosuke would probably be less convincing if he wasn't in a state of existential panic.

"If you say so, Yosuke," Yu said, his voice a mixture of concern and curiosity, but that was all. Yosuke thanked every major and minor deity that Yu wasn't the type to pry.

Unfortunately, Minato was. "Hey, Yu," he said, and even though the question was addressed to Yu, Minato's gaze was directed straight at Yosuke. Yosuke felt the same creeping dread when Elizabeth presented him with that horrible takoyaki, or when the girls got it in their heads to cook Mystery Food X.

"What is it?" Yu asked, curiously.

"Yosuke and I talked earlier, and —"

"Dude! You can't do this!" Yosuke frantically interrupted. He wondered if Minato was always this much of a jerk, or if he was making an extra effort to be a jerk just to Yosuke. "I talked to Mitsuru and everything! Why do you think I'm standing right here?"

"Oh, so you were here to speak with Mitsuru?" Yu asked. Yosuke groaned. Minato had baited him into a trap and Yosuke had taken the entire plate of food, crammed it all into his mouth, chewed, swallowed, and gone back for seconds. Yosuke glared at Minato. Minato gazed back, bored, but Yosuke got the distinct sense that he was feeling very proud of himself.

"That is correct," Mitsuru supplied. "We had just finished our business when the two of you appeared."

"Indeed," Zen nodded. "Yosuke had just finished asking —"

"Fine! I just wanted to join the strategy sessions, okay?" Yosuke burst out. He yanked his headphones from around his neck in frustration and clutched them in his right hand. If someone was going to come out and spill all of his crippling insecurities, Yosuke would just do it himself. At least he'd look like a brave loser, instead of just a loser.

"But it's cool — you know, you all got everything all planned out, already. You don't need me or anything. And I can still take out Shadows, so, just. Pretend like I was never here. I never said anything, none of this happened. Next time you want me to head into one of the labyrinths, just say the word, and, I'll get right to it. So, uh, it's cool. We're cool. I'll just, go get okonomiyaki. Or something."

Yosuke mumbled out the last words. Zen looked expressionless, Minato looked bored, Mitsuru looked unimpressed — Yu's face was the only exception, a whirling mix of surprise and worry that cut at Yosuke deeper than Mitsuru's gratuitous French. The floor was the most interesting thing in Yosuke's sight, and Yosuke stared down at it with the intensity of a thousand housewives fighting for the discounted end-of-the-day sushi. Sixty percent off, buy it before it goes bad, it's practically a steal, you won't see prices this low anywhere else, every day's great at your Junes.

"I can vouch for him."

Yosuke snapped his head up. Yu's words were barely louder than a whisper, but their tone was calm and their rhythm was steady and their cadence was even.

"I appreciate that, Narukami, but Hanamura and I have already discussed this. There was little that was brought to the table, and we mutually agreed that the fit was poor."

"Yosuke has been a great help to me and the rest of the Investigation Team," Yu countered. "I'm not sure what the two of you talked about. But I can say that he has a very instinctive awareness of how groups work together. He understands the way I think, and I've always appreciated bouncing ideas off of him."

"His quick thinking saved Akihiko and Ken in the Group Date Cafe," Minato added. Yosuke snapped his head toward Minato. Who told Minato that? Was Minato trying to help Yosuke or hurt him? Yosuke was getting whiplash.

Mitsuru frowned, processing the new information. She evidently reached some sort of decision, because she lifted her head and stabbed Yosuke with her eyes. Yosuke was grateful he hadn't had any tea in the past few hours.

"Hanamura," she commanded. "When I inquired regarding your skills, this is precisely the information I was seeking. Why did you not mention any of this?"

"Er, well…" Yosuke stammered. Yosuke didn't mention it because Mitsuru was really scary. It probably wasn't a good idea to say that, though.

"Well, _ça ne fait rien_ , as they say," Mitsuru said, shaking her head. Yosuke didn't know who 'they' were and had no clue what that meant, but after Mitsuru explained that beautiful gesture thing, he wasn't about to ask. He'd just assume it was a compliment. "If your abilities are as our leader and vice-leader say they are, then I would be loath to dismiss you. So long as you remember that our meetings are entirely professional and you conduct yourself accordingly, I encourage you to provide your counsel."

"O-okay! I can do that!"

" _Très bien_ ," Mitsuru said, and nodded once, firmly. "I look forward to working together, Hanamura," she announced, and reached out a hand for Yosuke to shake. There was a smile on her face — small, thin, and entirely professional, but real — and Yosuke took her hand with an entirely unprofessional and actually very goofy smile of his own.

* * *

"I made a total ass out of myself," Yosuke groaned.

"We've all done it," Yu reassured him, walking beside him, only a step ahead. "That's all in the past, anyway, so I wouldn't worry about it too much. Are the planning meetings just as exciting as you thought they'd be?"

Yosuke snorted a laugh. "As if. Mitsuru runs things with an iron fist. We'd probably have memos printed out for each of us if there were printers here."

Yu cocked his head in surprise. "You didn't get the agenda for our next meeting? I could have sworn I passed it to you…"

"Wait, what?" Yosuke yelped. "Since when did —? Crap, Mitsuru's gonna —"

A crafty smile teased its way up Yu's lips.

Yosuke scowled. "Hardy har har, Partner. Maybe you should do stand-up once we get out of here."

"You really think so? I was planning on doing the weather on TV, actually." Yu cleared his throat, then looked straight at Yosuke with a serious gaze that suggested he was about to announce a death in the family. He began speaking in a perfect monotone. "Today, the high will be thirty-one degrees and sunny, perfect weather for taking cat naps in the sun. However, there's a front coming in and by tomorrow it will be raining cats and dogs. We encourage all cats in the area to seek out shelter —"

Yosuke threw back his head. "Partneeeeeer…"

"The weather affects cats, too. It's only appropriate that there's someone they can rely on for the forecast."

"Right. Let me know when you find a cat that understands Japanese."

"They're smarter than you think, Yosuke."

"Yeah, I'll eat my headphones if there's such a thing as a talking cat," Yosuke huffed. A new song began playing from Yosuke's music player. The thing was still fuzzing some of the songs Yosuke liked best, but seemed to be working better now — Naoto thought it had something to do with something electromagnetic wavelengths something and varying something frequencies something something. Whatever. It was all way above him, but Yosuke wasn't about to question it, as long as it worked.

The track pumping from around his neck was new (he'd only just downloaded it the day before the cultural festival), from some up-and-coming instrumentalist group, popular enough to be raved about on obscure online forums, but new enough to still be considered niche. Yosuke didn't consider instrumentals to be his favorite genre, but there was something appealing about the languid flow of the composition, the pitter-patter of plucking strings, the soft whimsy of a reedy oboe, the intervals of percussive timpani that boomed like rolling thunder.

"Thanks," Yosuke mumbled out, over the oboe floating from his headphones like leaves on a windy day. "For, you know. Putting in a good word for me with Mitsuru."

"Of course," Yu answered, the response seeming to come as naturally as the moon rising to illuminate the sky after the sun sets. "I didn't know that's what was bothering you. You could have just told me that's what you were worried about," Yu said. From most people, it would have come out as a chastising rebuke, but from Yu, it was only a matter-of-fact observation. Yosuke appreciated that.

"Yeah, well, you know. You're busy with your leader-ing. I didn't want to give you more to worry about. You got better things to do than for me to get in your way. Especially now that there's twice as many of us, and all those S.E.E.S. people seem way more professional about this whole Shadow-hunting thing."

"Yosuke." Yu's voice was firm. "I've always valued your input. That's true in the TV World, and that's true here. After you got hurt in You in Wonderland, I've kept you and Koromaru separate to avoid something like that from happening again. And that's why I put Naoto on the team after the incident earlier in the Group Date Cafe. Just because you weren't formally part of our strategy sessions doesn't mean I wasn't listening to your advice."

Yosuke gawked at him. The instrumental song playing from his headphones faded to black, replaced by the faint pulses of pop.

Yosuke was such an idiot.

"I'm such an idiot," Yosuke groaned loudly.

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am. I'm Prince Idiot McIdiot Idiotworth of Idiot Castle."

"Okay, you're an idiot."

"Thanks for the moral support, Partner," Yosuke grumbled.

"What?" Yu frowned innocently. "I disagreed with you. You didn't like that. So I agreed with you, and you don't like that, either. What do you want me to say?"

"Just — auuuugh," Yosuke groaned again.

"Hey." Shinjiro strolled over to them, hunched over and considering Yu and Yosuke with flinty eyes. Yosuke desperately willed his face to look less like a lobster. "I think everybody's rested up," Shinjiro grunted, and jabbed a thumb behind him, to where Teddie was apparently attempting to serenade Yukari with a song he wrote "es- _bear-_ cially for Yuka-chan!" ("That pun doesn't even make sense!" Yukari shot back, and Yosuke had to agree with her.)

"How about we get a move on, already," Shinjiro suggested. The exasperation written on his face suggested it was more of a demand.

"Yeah, I'm gonna agree with you on that one," Yosuke said, just as Teddie flung himself at Yukari for a hug. Yukari stepped out of the way effortlessly, and Teddie went tumbling into the wall, finally peeling himself away from it with a dazed smile.

Yu nodded. "All right, everyone," he announced, in his leader voice. "Let's keep going — I'd like to get through at least one more of these destined partner questions before we call it quits."

"Oooh!" Teddie piped up, scrambling over to the group with remarkable speed given how short his legs were. Yukari followed after him, eyeing him the same way Dojima-san looked at Yosuke when Yu brought him to the Dojima house for the first time. Which meant that if Teddie knew any better, he should be looking for the nearest bathroom right about now. "I can't wait to find out who Sensei's destined partner is! Is it Mit-chan? I remember you scored with Mit-chan!"

Yosuke groaned. "It's _not_ called scoring, and will you can it, already, Ted? This whole destined partner bullcrap's not real, anyway."

"You don't want to find out who my destined partner is, Yosuke?"

"What? Of course I do!" Yosuke defended himself. Yosuke stopped. Yosuke realized what he just said. "Wait! Wait, wait, wait. I mean — that's what everyone's thinking, right? Not that I'm any more interested in the answer than anybody else or anything! It's just, why would this machine know anything, you know?"

Yukari leveled a skeptical look at him. "I don't think there's anything wrong with admitting that we're all a little curious who this matchmaking machine decides our leader's destined partner will be. It doesn't have to be real to be interesting."

Yosuke nodded furiously. "Yeah, Yukari's right! This whole thing's completely bogus, but I want to know the answer anyway!"

"If that's what you thought, you should have just said it."

Yosuke had a legitimate excuse: He said things without thinking. Check and mate.

"Are we going, or what," Shinjiro demanded, already a dozen paces down the path, looking back at them with an impatient frown. Yu nodded, and moved to lead the way down the hall, Yosuke and then Shinjiro following behind him, Teddie bouncing behind Shinjiro, and, at Yukari's insistence, more than ten steps in front of her at all times. They turned the corner, and came face-to-face with the telltale pink-and-white door.

Shinjiro sighed. "Let's just get this over with."

"I wonder what question the machine will come up with this time?" Yukari wondered aloud. "They've all been pretty… Well, we'll go with 'unique,' so far."

"I bet if I were getting the questions, you'd be my destined partner, Yuka-chan!" Teddie bubbled.

"Well, you're not. So —" Yukari said, dismissively.

"That's not fair at all!" Teddie decided, frowning as if he'd just been deprived of all the world's Topsicles. "I demand we go through this labyrinth again so we can find Teddie's destined partner!"

"Hey, uh, Partner," Yosuke ventured. He looked away from Yu and studied the floor with all his might. "You meant what you said — back when you were talking to Mitsuru? About me understanding the way you think, and all that?"

"I did."

Yosuke studied the floor even mightier. He felt his face heat up, and _dammit_ , those compliments definitely _weren't_ making him blush, thank you very much.

"All right, let's go inside," Yu announced, as he and Shinjiro forced open the door and the rest of the group filtered in behind them. There was the sound of the by-now familiar whirring of machinery, the also-familiar monotonous snobbery, and then finally, the question came.

"What's in your refrigerator?" the mechanical voice lilted.

"Grass," Yu answered without hesitation.

"Wha…? Grass?" Yosuke parroted. "Partner, what are you putting in your fridge?"

"I don't understand. Doesn't everybody put grass in their fridge?" Yu asked innocently.

Yosuke groaned for what felt like the millionth time. "For the record, you were wrong — I totally don't understand the way you think, Partner."

**Author's Note:**

> Joke's on you Yosuke — Morgana's gonna have something to say about talking cats in PQ2.


End file.
